Meeting the Kids

This dating thing is hard enough, but adding children in the mix is a whole other thing.  I have introduced Kaylie to one other person I have dated.  When things don't work out or if your child doesn't like the new person in your life it is difficult.  Hopefully if things don't work out, your child won't have grown too attached to the person, and if they just plain don't like your new man (or woman) it could be the end of maybe what could have been a great fit for you.  Or perhaps, it creates other tensions that make your relationship as a whole strained.  I have never been a big supporter of introducing my daughter to many of the people I have dated.  Mostly because my ex-husband did that with women he would date and there was one that my daughter was devastated about when they stopped dating.  I feel like divorce is such a life changing event for a child that introducing them to people you are just casually dating is too emotionally draining for them.  Its a messy situation any way and that seemed to make things so much worse for our situation. 


The first time I introduced her to someone was a mistake.  I knew deep down that the relationship wouldn't be long lasting, but we were spending a lot of time together and he had a small child and so I went along with it.  I shouldn't have.  Not because Kaylie was fond of him, and she wasn't affected when we ended the relationship, but because I let what seemed good in the moment take precedence over what I knew would be the long term result of the relationship.  Live and learn.  From that time forward I never introduced her to anyone...until now!!


So the nice guy....the guy interested in a real relationship....he is great!!  He is someone I could definitely have a future with.  We have been dating for a few months and we think it's time we meet the kids!!  Kaylie got to meet him first!


Rex and I had been hiking in the mountains collecting sticks to make a Christmas Tree project for my activity day girls.  It was getting later in the day and Kaylie would be coming home from school.  So when she came home, Rex was at the house & I introduced them.  She was of course shy and didn't interact much, but she wasn't closed off to meeting him.  She knew I had been dating him for awhile and she would frequently ask if she was going to get to meet him.  She thought he was nice.  She was interested in meeting his kids and learning more about them.


Once he had met my daughter we thought it would be best if both Kaylie & I came to his house to meet his children.  We planned to come over for dinner one night & just hang out and get to know each other a little bit.  I was nervous, but excited to meet the kids I had heard so much about.  They were very polite and quiet, but welcoming.  I'm sure it was equally nerve racking for them.  We had a nice time talking and finding out a little about  each other!!  His son sure does LOVE sports!!  He knew every stat for every sport..especially baseball!  And his youngest daughter wanted to play with her toys and be included in every aspect of the night!  And her curly hair....ADORABLE!!  His oldest daughter was more quiet and reserve, but sweet and friendly.  She is a talented piano player and it was fun to listen to her play.


Overall it was a successful night!  The kids seemed to get along well with each other, which is one thing I worry about.  Kaylie being an only child...I hope that she would be accepted as a sibling or at least a lifelong friend and included in every part of the family, even when we aren't around.  I know that will take some time to develop.  Its a big step for everyone!


Recently we attended a BYU basketball game...did I mention Rex is a Cougar graduate??  So we went to a basketball game together.  It was fun and the kids were funny posing for pictures.  I am really enjoying the time we spend together.  They are all great kids and I kinda like Rex too!!  I'm still optimistic on where this could go 😉